Getting started: How can I support my man to be more active?
Changing behaviour is a process with many small steps along the way. As a support person there are things you can do at each of these steps to help your man to change to a healthier lifestyle.
Getting started, one of the most important things you can do is to listen. Listen to the reasons your man gives for wanting to change. Listen to his priorities. Listening can be made even more effective by practicing ‘active listening’. This technique involves reflecting statements back to the person and asking open ended questions to invite more insight into the person and their situation. It is a great technique for connecting more closely with a person and to help guide them towards their goals.
For an excellent introduction to active listening click here:
Help with goal setting
As part of the getting started process your man will be talking about and starting to set some goals. Goals come in two varieties:
Long term goals – where you want to be ultimately
Short term goals – small steps towards your long term goal
You can help with the goal setting process by asking your man to reflect on the following questions:
How important is this goal?
How confident are you that you can achieve this goal?
If the goal is not important then your man is not likely to be motivated to achieve it. Time to talk about a goal that is important to him.
If the goal is important but his confidence is low then it’s time to break it down into smaller steps (short term goals).
Try using the SMART system to test these short term goals:
S Is the goal Specific?
M Can you Measure it?
A Can you Achieve this goal?
R Is this goal Realistic?
T What is the Time-frame for achieving this goal?